Compassion, I never asked for it – #1000Speak

Sometimes life takes paths that we do not want it to take. Sometimes things happen that we know will happen, but that we do not want to happen. There is a thing called death, dying, loosing a loved one, that we are never completely ready for, even if everything points into that direction.

Last month, just 3 days, after I posted my #1000Speak post, my mother passed away. In that very post I wrote about how I learnt about compassion during the last year, I did not mention how important my mother has been in teaching me about compassion. She could always lend an ear to a friend who needed listening to, or helped when it was possible to do so. I recall her being completely shattered by the situation in Libya a few years back, for her following the news was never a good thing.

Never in my life have I felt so much compassion from others than in this past month. Once we started to announce to family, friends and acquaintances that she had left us, the words of condolences, compassion and love started flooding our lives. Of course these words will not be able to fill in the emptiness that my mother’s passing has left behind, but maybe these acts of compassion will help with the healing and keeping a vivid memory of her.

Every email,
every hug,
every smile,
every tear,
every “I am so sorry”
every “stay strong”
every “courage”
every “your mother was a great woman”
every card,
every word written,
every word spoken,
every phone call,
every “oh s***!”,

was a sign of heartfelt compassion!

Condolences I have not read every card, or email, or sentence written in the condolence book. I have not replied to any messages friends send me or comments that I received on this post regarding my mother’s passing away. I am taking my time, because with every day I realise a bit more what has happened, and every day I can heel a bit more. All this compassion definitely helps.

Maybe you can imagine how touched I was by the tears of the caretaker of one of the neighbouring houses, when she asked me how my mother was doing and I told her that she had died. Her expressed compassion led me to comfort her myself. Or when I bought my eggs at the boucher’s the day he had received the card, his heart seemed broken. He told me that all day he had thought about the news and how even he never really knew my mother, her passing away marked him more than usually. Maybe it was her continuous smile, and her deep-seated kindness, she did not care what someone did for a living or how they dressed, all that counted was that you were another human being worth at least a smile, a nod and a “hello”. Only this week I crossed the path of young boy living in my parent’s building, he stopped me to say his condolences and was on the brink of tears, and that when he barely knew her.

I was touched by the emails I received. A friend from school found out though my blog post Breaking the Silence, his email is so kind and encouraging, bubbling with strengthening compassion. A fellow blogger wrote me an email once she read my post, another act of compassion. And all of your comments on that very post have been so moving, so full of love and compassion. Thank you!

I never asked for any of the compassion I have received this past month. I had no idea that there would be so much compassion in such a situation. But I am grateful for all of this compassion.

Again, thank you!

For everyone out there who is compassionate, thank you! You are making someone’s life a bit easier today. You are the ray of light on a cloudy day.


This post is part of the #1000Speak linkup, this month’s theme is compassion and happiness, but I have focused only on compassion. Please make sure to check out the other posts of the linkup, and maybe join this month with your own post?


© Solveig Werner 2016. All rights reserved.

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Advent Calendar Overview

Advent Calendar Overview

Advent CalendarFor the first 24 days of December 2015, my blog was turned into a multi-contributor Advent Calendar. It was definitely something fun, even though I realised that doing such a dense series takes a lot of time. I actually did far less writing than I had thought, and I read less blogs than I normally do. Still, it was great! I learnt a lot of things about how to be a host blogger, how to set deadlines, formulate guidelines and find my way around twitter (watch out for my very own twitter tutorial coming in 2016…). What a pleasant surprise that none of the participants were like students, if they were late it was for a good reason, and it was rare that things arrived late.

Many bloggers, who I see as pros out there, were still worried that their piece was too long, too short, or not what I was looking for. What does this tell me, I who have done a mere 2 guest posts so far, that however long we have been doing this, we are very similar.

Now, I try to thank these 21 guests as much as I can, but I feel that I cannot do them justice. It was amazing to have 21! people participate in the advent calendar.

87,5% of the Advent Calendar posts were by guest. As for gender equality, of those 21 guests 3 were male, that means 14,3%, so not all that equal. 4 continents were represented, but more than 4 were mentioned in the posts. As for the age span, I don’t really know all of the ages, I myself am 27 and don’t boast about it… I have the feeling we went from 21 (almost 22) to about 60, correct me if I am wrong! Two of the guests celebrated their birthdays on the 24th and the 25th, do you know who they are?

With this post, I want to thank all of the participants of the advent calendar. I want to thank everyone who read, liked, and commented on the posts. I want to thank everyone who shared posts of it on social media and their own blogs. I want to thank everyone in advance for coming back and reading the posts.

To make the reading and coming back to the calendar easier, you can find links to all 24 posts here:

Day 1: Opening the First Door by Solveig Werner
Day 2: My First Christmas at the Age of 31 by Doctor Gulara Vincent
Day 3: Oh, Christmas Tree by Melanie Noell Bernard
Day 4: Cherry Blossoms and Snowflakes by Solveig Werner
Day 5: My First Christmas in California by Evelyne Holingue
Day 6: Nikolaus I Still Believe! by Solveig Werner
Day 7: A Christmas Kodak Moment by Tara Paray
Day 8: The Gift of Reading by Anabel Marsh
Day 9: Christmas Memories of Rome by Judith Works
Day 10: Christmas Traditions by Diana Gordon
Day 11: The Christmas Storm by Trent McDonald
Day 12: The Legendary Magic of the Poinsettia by Corina Carrasco
Day 13: Christmas in Zimbabwe by Beaton
Day 14: A Whirlwind by Camille de Fleurville
Day 15: Christmas: The Perfect Excuse For A Fight? by Lucy Brazier
Day 16: A Collage of Christmas Memories by S.D. Gates
Day 17: A Stinking Hot, Australian Christmas by Rowena Newton
Day 18: Christmas Music with Kate Edwards
Day 19: Holidays are: Food and Family by Robin Rivera
Day 20: One Tradition After Another by Kerry K
Day 21: The Advent Calendar by Geoff Le Pard
Day 22: Moments in Time by Melissa Barker-Simpson
Day 23: Tom Bowcock’s Eve by Rosie Reast
Day 24: A German Christmas by Solveig Werner

Thank you! Have fun reading!


© Solveig Werner 2015. All rights reserved.