Sometimes life takes paths that we do not want it to take. Sometimes things happen that we know will happen, but that we do not want to happen. There is a thing called death, dying, loosing a loved one, that we are never completely ready for, even if everything points into that direction.
Last month, just 3 days, after I posted my #1000Speak post, my mother passed away. In that very post I wrote about how I learnt about compassion during the last year, I did not mention how important my mother has been in teaching me about compassion. She could always lend an ear to a friend who needed listening to, or helped when it was possible to do so. I recall her being completely shattered by the situation in Libya a few years back, for her following the news was never a good thing.
Never in my life have I felt so much compassion from others than in this past month. Once we started to announce to family, friends and acquaintances that she had left us, the words of condolences, compassion and love started flooding our lives. Of course these words will not be able to fill in the emptiness that my mother’s passing has left behind, but maybe these acts of compassion will help with the healing and keeping a vivid memory of her.
every “I am so sorry”
every “stay strong”
every “your mother was a great woman”
every word written,
every word spoken,
every phone call,
every “oh s***!”,
was a sign of heartfelt compassion!
I have not read every card, or email, or sentence written in the condolence book. I have not replied to any messages friends send me or comments that I received on this post regarding my mother’s passing away. I am taking my time, because with every day I realise a bit more what has happened, and every day I can heel a bit more. All this compassion definitely helps.
Maybe you can imagine how touched I was by the tears of the caretaker of one of the neighbouring houses, when she asked me how my mother was doing and I told her that she had died. Her expressed compassion led me to comfort her myself. Or when I bought my eggs at the boucher’s the day he had received the card, his heart seemed broken. He told me that all day he had thought about the news and how even he never really knew my mother, her passing away marked him more than usually. Maybe it was her continuous smile, and her deep-seated kindness, she did not care what someone did for a living or how they dressed, all that counted was that you were another human being worth at least a smile, a nod and a “hello”. Only this week I crossed the path of young boy living in my parent’s building, he stopped me to say his condolences and was on the brink of tears, and that when he barely knew her.
I was touched by the emails I received. A friend from school found out though my blog post Breaking the Silence, his email is so kind and encouraging, bubbling with strengthening compassion. A fellow blogger wrote me an email once she read my post, another act of compassion. And all of your comments on that very post have been so moving, so full of love and compassion. Thank you!
I never asked for any of the compassion I have received this past month. I had no idea that there would be so much compassion in such a situation. But I am grateful for all of this compassion.
Again, thank you!
For everyone out there who is compassionate, thank you! You are making someone’s life a bit easier today. You are the ray of light on a cloudy day.
This post is part of the #1000Speak linkup, this month’s theme is compassion and happiness, but I have focused only on compassion. Please make sure to check out the other posts of the linkup, and maybe join this month with your own post?
© Solveig Werner 2016. All rights reserved.